Last week we spoke of the importance of cultivating confidence but it is hard to do that if you are struggling with depression. Depression can be triggered by many things. Loneliness, breaking up with a boyfriend, struggles in your marriage and divorce are all reasons we as women struggle with depression.
I struggled with depression for a many years after my marriage ended. I was disappointed in him and disappointed in myself. I was frustrated because I felt like he didn’t want to fight to make it work. No one goes into marriage planning for it to fail. The guilt of being depressed also weighed heavy on me. I was a Christian and knew that I was blessed in spite of the failed marriage but was still depressed. I began to get sick of myself always being depressed. So I became determined to overcome my struggle with depression. If you are struggling too I want to give up some simple ways to overcome depression:
- Practice Mindfulness
A depressed mind tends to mull over all that is wrong and worries unnecessarily about all the negative possibilities that may emerge in the future. This negative thought cycle reinforces misery and is not helpful in managing to overcome depression. Mindfulness involves focusing on the present moment and is a skill that needs to be practiced.
- Listen to Upbeat Music
I have always thought of music as food for the soul. An upbeat tune can change an atmosphere instantly and create a more positive vibe. Listening to upbeat, happy music alters brain chemistry and can improve your mood.
- Stop the Negative Self Talk
Depressed people tend to see the world in a negative way. When things go wrong they blame themselves and when they go right, they put it down to luck. Depression reinforces self-doubt and feelings of worthlessness. Monitor your inner negative talk and make allowances for this type of thinking by reminding yourself that your thinking is that of a depressed person, not a healthy functioning person. Don’t take your thoughts seriously when you are feeling low. Acknowledge the thoughts but this doesn’t mean you have to believe them. Keep perspective.
- Distract Yourself – By doing things that make you happy
If possible, do your best to distract yourself from over thinking. Your thoughts are your enemy when depression sets in. Watch a funny movie, Take your dog to the dog park or go for a bike ride. Read a good book if you are able to concentrate or finish a puzzle. Do anything that takes your mind off your fears and worries. Keeping busy is an effective way to overcome depression.
- Write in a Journal
A journal can work in two ways. Use it to write down fears and worries. Sometimes, having an outlet in this way can be soothing and ease your mind. Another good way to use a journal (I prefer this way) is to write at least five things down every day that you are grateful for. This forces us to think more positively and can help to remind us that things are never that bad. In a gratitude journal, you can write about anything that happened in the day that made you feel appreciative. A stranger smiling at you, the sun shining..anything positive will do!
- Connect with Family and Friends
This can be one of the hardest things to do when feeling depressed but it is one of the most rewarding activities. Force yourself to go out. Isolating oneself from others may seem a good idea but put a limit on it and then get out there again. This can have a huge positive effect on your mood.
- Exercise
Regular exercise has benefits for helping to overcome depression. Exercise releases endorphins which improve natural immunity and improve mood. Besides lifting your mood, regular exercise offers other health benefits, such as lowering blood pressure, protecting against heart disease, cancer and boosting self-esteem. Experts advise getting half an hour to an hour of moderate exercise, such as brisk walking at least three to four times per week.
If need more help, I am here. Let’s work together to overcome your challenges and achieve your goal of becoming an amazing wife!
Peace, Love, and Blessings,
The Wife Coach
